It’s not every day that you come across a statement that is so universally applicable that it can be used in almost every situation known to man. For example, I don’t recall coming across one yesterday. But today I did.
To save you from clicking a link to read a dull article, I have provided a dull, basically inaccurate paraphrasing of the article right here: two Amish guys buy some land that has a zoning ordinance prohibiting horses. They promptly move in with their horses, council won’t change the zoning, now they face fines.
Daniel King, one of the Amish guys heretofore referenced (lol legalspeak lol) had this to say:
“We’re living in America here. I can’t believe you can’t have a horse for religious transportation,” King said. “It makes no sense at all.”
Seriously, WHAT THE FUCK? That was until I realized this is the answer we have all been looking for.
store clerk: “sorry, we are out of pokemon cards”
me: “We’re living in America here. I can’t believe you can’t have a horse for religious transportation”
store clerk: *explodes*
boss: “budget is down, so that new dual xeon with 2 gb ram you needed to access the Internet won’t be approved for another two months”
me: “We’re living in America here. I can’t believe you can’t have a horse for religious transportation”
boss: *explodes*
Zen.
(ed note: this is the part where I wrote up an extremely poignant argument why people shouldn’t get special treatment because of their religion la la la I’m so smart and shit. Then I deleted it. You can thank me in comments.)
noneIf it wern’t for my horse, I wouldn’t have spent that year in college.Bonus points for naming the source!
gcGEORGE CARLIN?
No.Lewis Black, simpleton.
Is this 4 real???WTF do i care?…..Horses are smelly dam animals anyway and i have no need for them, altho 300 under the hood does come in handy when needed. Tell the Amish guys to get a fuckin computor and learn how to use it and stop playing with horses, they bite!!!!
uhhthank you
*humps*i get off on your posts. you’re freaking hilarious dude…and you smell good too.
HaI live in Amish Country USA, otherwise known as Lancaster PA. This kind of crap happens all the time, and that’s just the tip of the iceberg. What pisses me off is that their metal rimmed wagon wheels are allowed to use my roads, rip them up, dump horse shit all over them, and the fuckers don’t pay a dime in taxes to cover any of it. That’s right, Amish don’t pay tax. When they’re 18 they go and sign some bullshit form that basically says paying taxes is against their religion. And they get away with it. Now, they also don’t have access to federally funded programs like welfare or social security. But they do have access to all the local stuff, like the roads that my taxes pay for. You might think, so what, they have no real income anyway right? Wrong. They run many tourist trap type businesses, and make a fucking shitload of money. They literally OWN my county. Yet they don’t contribute one red cent to the tax base. And don’t let apperances fool you, they are not simple minded country folk. They’re businessmen plain and simple. Many of them do own computers, phones, fax machines, etc… As long as it’s for the business it’s ok, although they usually are forbidden to keep it in their house (they put the stuff in their barn usually).
HmmmSounds like it’s time to raid an Amish home/barn. Steal some electronics. What are they gonna do, call the cops?Amish guy: Yes, my name is Ebenezer Horselover. My barn was broken into, they took my computer, my fax machine and my big screen TV.Cop: What? Amish people don’t have that stuff. In fact, you don’t even have a phone, how are you calling me?Amish guy: Ummm….Cop: Go away, and stop overcharging my wife for your shitty woodcraft! *click*
lmaoahaha… oh my, i enjoyed the exploding to a dangerous degreedanke