Time for an open letter…
Dear fuckers who bashed in my car window last night:
I appreciate the fact that your meth-addled brain probably cannot completely utilize your analytical faculties, so it’s likely that you do not have the skills nor the available tools to properly open my car’s passenger door. So I understand your need to bash the sucker in with a railroad spike. Seriously, I get it.
I would just personally like to congratulate you on being the second idiot to attempt to steal my stereo (which I paid $250 for three years ago, perhaps you should try stealing the whole car next time?) and completely fucking fail. Not only that, I’d also like to thank you for completely overlooking the numerous items in the car which individually are worth more on the street than my meager sound system.
Also, just like last time, I really do have to smile when I see the vandalism left behind during your obvious fit of frustration upon the realization that you are, indeed, the worst car stereo theif known to man. I say this, because at least the last guy who failed at this didn’t need to break the Goddamned window.
Love,
Sharkey
I’d like to meet the fellow who did this. Not for any kind of macho bluster, mind you. I’m a big motherfucker, but I’d imagine that if he had the inclination to steal my shit, he probably carries a knife and a drug-withdwrawl-induced surly disposition. And while the two haven’t yet been formally introduced, I sincerely doubt that my ribcage and a serrated blade would get along too well.
No no, I would merely like to get a look at someone so fucking incompetent at theivery that they spend more time getting angry and vandalizing the car than they do poking around to make it a better score. For example, a simple pat-down of the expensive jacket that I carelessly left on the passenger seat would have made last night a pretty worthwhile endeavor. Well done, sport. Hopefully you were stupid enough to clutch that spike in your bare hands before you sent it through the glass. But I won’t hold my breath.
Hell, probably wasn’t a druggieProbably some stupid teen who just wanted to jack someones stereo to be \”cool\”. A real addict would have stolen every fucking thing in your car. I’ve seen a meth head ripping seats out of a car before, don’t kid yourself.
TipsHint: Leave the window down next time….
that carit was me yo….eyyyo ma bruvver…..even an illitarate brudder like me knows how ta spell thief man…its T H I E F not theif…..damn fools should go ta school more
i hate that shiti had the same thing happen to me. First they tried to pry the drivers side, and passenger door locks out with a screwdriver. When that failed, they broke the window, stole a 5 year old CD player, and left a brand new CD changer, which was not installed and sitting in the backseat. They also left about $300 worth of camping gear, and opted to take a bottle of cologne which was under the seat. I think it’s funny that they took the cologne, because that means they had to be looking around in their, and they missed a CD changer which was in plain site.