I live in a small enough town that our newspaper doesn’t have personals. However, if you travel a couple hours by horseback to a town or two over, you get a chance to read some great redneck reality drama played out in agate. The problem with hillbilly personals is that they’re pretty basic; you know, swingers, swingers, cousins, swingers. Dammit, where’s the really desperate psycho shit? The stuff that makes you double check your deadbolts at night? You’ve already guessed the punchline: right here.
If One More Woman Tells Me I’m Funny I Will Die
Im so funny im starting to bore myself, “Your so funny”, I get that ALL the time, actually im so fucking funny im starting to bore the tits of myself. I long for, your a great kisser, or jesus your hung like a donkey, or I love your sexy blue eyes, or even god forbid “I LOVE YOU” Im going to stop being funny for a while and just be serious, I am without a girlfriend and I WANT ONE. Please don’t be bi sexual, please don’t be a bitch, please don’t two time me, and please ( for the love of god! 🙂 don’t be the corporte careeer gestapo ice crotch type with no time for me. Never been told im ugly so thats good, straight laced guy, with a naughty but nice persoanality, im going thru a horney and lonely period in my life ( now that was tooooooooo fricken honest, start lieing god damm it), but i won’t settle with just anyone, i have some standards. this ad sucks. im at work, its sunny outside, and i am writing pure dribble. jesus, i wish i had a girlfriend….
[shudder]… I better check my locks just one more time.
You forgotYou forgot to lock your door properly last night. I was able to get in without a problem.You’re cute when you’re sleeping.
dumb fuck-Please don’t be bi sexual, please don’t be a bitch, please don’t two time me, and please ( for the love of god! 🙂 don’t be the corporte careeer gestapo ice crotch type with no time for me.- i know why he is lonely, look at his fucking requirements, no girl could meet that…they are all bithces, that’s why they are women. god love them. maybe this fucker really wants someone that is hung like a donkey. there is a reason people call you funny…and it doesn’t mean funny ha ha!