So after yesterday’s episode with the floor, I figured I’d call my doctor to see if he could get me some lovely antibiotics or something. Maybe some sweet painkillers to pass the time, if I’m nice enough. His office was, of course, closed for the day. I suspected this, so I browsed around looking for a walk-in clinic.
The website was quite vague, so I just called back the doc’s office and hit the urgent option button. I’ll spare you the 8 phone calls I had to make, with not much of a voice left mind you. It’s not that it wouldn’t be comical, or that I lack the literary faculties to convey said comedy, it’s just that I became so enraged during that series of phone calls that I began hacking up foreign substances that I’d never seen before. Rather than rile myself up again, suffice to say that I told one guy that his name would replace “Wii” as my final words of spite were I to expire thanks to his indifference, and told another woman that I’d be by to cough into her non-whip half-caf mocha latte (really hard to say when your voice is gone) if I didn’t see results.
So after all of that, the doctor on call told me (secondhand) that he wouldn’t see me, and that he wouldn’t authorize a walk-in visit. His reason? I belong in the ER. That’s right. The fucking ER. He said that my symptoms warranted a trip to the hospital (to which I’d have to drive myself) rather than an easy office visit and some antibiotics. I told the receptionist that I’d sleep on it.
Still alive bitches. Not only that, but the receptionist at my actual doctors office gave me the walk-in referral immediately because, according to her, they were taking off early today. I’m glad its such an easy breezy afternoon for them. I’m going to go sit in a walk-in lobby for awhile and make people vaguely uncomfortable with my angry presence.
WowWell, I see God doesn’t have that good of a grip on ya’. Too bad the ER doesn’t have a dirve-through medication stattion, bubble-gum brand for kids.
Damn doctors!Feel better, man. Hope they give you some mega-codine.
Paging Dr. MartMaybe Wal-Mart’s new medical service will curtail some of this behavior. Or at least ruin some long weekends.
Your diseaseNo offense, but I think you weren’t really fair to get mad at the on call for suggesting you go to the ER (the other stuff, he was a tool).Just from what you tell us, you were alternating between comatose or extremely thirsty, weakness to the point of collapse, and your voice was almost non-existant.The first thing I hear whenever I call a doctor is ‘if this is an emergency, hang up and dial 911’. I would say lying on the floor, with little voice, no energy, chugging water and sweating it out as fast as it goes in is serious enough to warrant a hospital visit. I’m glad your OK; I love your site and visit it daily; and I’ve had a ton of problems with doctors (don’t get long term illnesses) but in that one bit, the doctor was fair. Plus, doctors get sued like crazy; in his defense an ER would probably have better documentation in case you sued him for some reason (office closed, not helping over phone, or the clinic mistreated your illness and you sued him for sending you there).
Your diseaseNah, he’s got the right, being the badass mofo’ of this site. Dad’s a doctor, sleep and allergy, I have yet to hear of a lawsuit…yet…. anywho, it’s ok, he’s not dead, it’s impossible for him to die.