Somebody Broke The First Two Rules Of Fight Camp

It would be even funnier if this was one of those fat camps: [ Summer Camp Turns Into “Fight Camp” ]

Police in Virginia are investigating claims from about two dozen kids that summer camp counselors arranged fistfights between young campers and even charged admission to see the brawls.

Franklin County Sheriff Quint Overton said this week that kids ages 9 to 13 were told to lie to their parents about the fights after several campers suffered black eyes and one broke his hand at a 4-H summer camp. The counselors allegedly also allowed betting on the fights.

My summer camps weren’t anywhere near that cool. We just sat around playing freeze tag and shit. Although you shouldn’t knock freeze tag, it is a game of superior kickassness. But I’m sure that you’ll all agree that between learning to trounce a kid twice your size and the ability to freeze in place like an asshole for minutes at a time, the mighty beat-down is going to be more useful in junior high.

What’s really sad is that I can hear hundreds of you nerds cracking your knuckles out there, daydreaming of going back to the bully who terrorized your childhood and knocking his teeth in after an 8-week trip to Camp Kickass. It’s sad, because all you would’ve learned at Camp Kickass is how to take an effective beating. I mean I know David & Golliath is a popular story, but I’ve got news for you: David had a rock, all you’ve probably got is asthma.

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Categorized as News

By Sharkey

I run bamf.

6 comments

  1. bahI went to camp, and we only had vaguely homoerotic pillow fights. However, I had the good sense to put rocks in mine.

  2. Asthma?I don’t have asthma….i was always jelous of the kids that did though….they never had to do anything. I’ve ben trying to give myself asthma the HERBAL way for years.No luckP.S. chicks dig pale skinny dudes

  3. On the ball…Damn Sharkey, it’s good to have you back. And by back I mean back to the truly cynical bastard you can be. Reading this article took me back to a time where BAMF used to be the pinnacle of all mockingness…

  4. Ass Woopin….Hey Shark-Man, having trouble with the past? Did the little women make you feel vunerable because she wants you to share more of your emotions with her and become one on the same plane? ***Fuck That***….Be Strong and say No way, i gotta be me!!!!!

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