Without the lovely Beyonce Knowles, there would be no Destiny’s Child. Not because the group would not exist without her talent, I’m just saying that her father would beat the remaining members unmercifully, and then destroy their careers to boot. He’d probably pee on their rugs, a la Big Lebowski. No, that was not a euphamism, pervert.
I know Beyonce’s father doesn’t look very intimidating. And since he only seems to destroy the lives of band-members, I’m sure you feel pretty cozy. So you waltz around town talkin’ trash, secure in your safe little universe. But then comes that fateful day where an envelope arrives. It contains an invitation that you did not quite expect…
You get all excited for a moment. Of course you accept, I mean, who wouldn’t want to be an MTV superstar? You could be on Cribs! Well, once you get out of your mom’s basement and into a place that you wouldn’t be embarassed to show off to the world. Then it dawns on you. Why the Hell would they pick you out of everyone on the planet? More than likely, you’re a man anyway, and probably a fat reject. Why on Earth would…
*knock at the door*
You stroll over and look through the peephole. Why, its a couple of very official-looking thugs! No doubt they are here to usher you into the limo which will drive you to your fabulous new lifestyle! You swiftly undo the chain lock and open the door.
*Crack*
*Thud*
… That was way too much for a simple SOTD. I must be really out of it. How soon are you supposed to go into your house after they ant-bomb it? One, two hours?
hmmthey don’t use some form of hallucinegenic to bomb ants by any chance?.the pie is much appreciated
Last NameHer last name is what disturbs me. Reminds me of a fat red-headed man(?).