BAMF

Heavens to sweet fucking murgatroid, have any of you tried out the amalgamated games over at Broken Function? They’ve got MegaMan vs. Ghosts N Goblins and MegaMan vs. Metroid.

The bitchin’ thing about these games? It remembers whether or not you won. So if you get Samus Aran’s powers at the end of the MM vs. Metroid game, you get to keep them in the MM vs. GnG game. Pretty fucking nifty additional feature.

In case you didn’t know, Adrianne Curry is the super hot model who incredulously decided to start fucking Chris “Peter Brady” Knight after the two appeared on “The Surreal Life” together. Like the placebo effect, the location of Jimmy Hoffa, and why nobody’s offered Jessica Alba enough money to get nude on camera yet, some things will forever remain a mystery.

Adrianna just did a spread in Playboy, which was a moving experience. I’m sure I don’t need to explain the euphamism, we’ll just move right along.

That… sucks.

I got up this morning, and upon my windshield I beheld a substance unbeknownst to me, a native Californian. There, glistening in the sun, was a thick layer of ice adhered to my entire viewing area.

What the unholy Hell is going on around here? Hot as shit one week, an icy windshield (a first, in my 20-some-odd-years of life in So Cal) the next. I’m thinking that Mother Nature wants to kick the living crap out of us for all the fluorocarbons and cow farts that we’ve allowed to escape into the atmosphere. In the meantime, I have to go shopping for a heavy coat and a pair of shorts.

Mmmmmm, always loved the brunettes, especially hot British ones. And Kate Beckinsale has the total package. Even after having kids, she’s still dead sexy. And she’ll probably be sexy in the undoubtedly awful followup to Underworld: Evolution, which hits theaters real soon.

Mmm-mmm. Almost makes you forget about Serendipity, with a body like that.

FaaQ Captures Some Interesting Stuff From “Lost.” (HEAVY SPOILERS)

I love this fucking show.

Oh God, what the Hell is Marvel thinking? (thanks NHDJ1) They’re redesigning the Spidey costume, and from what it sounds like they’re hinting at, the Scarlet Spider will make a return visit. This is why I don’t really read comics anymore.

Word has been building for months now, and comic fans have been dying to know- what is Spider-Man’s new costume?! Well, folks, here it is! Recognize the color scheme? You should, it’s playing an important role in the future of the web-slinger!

After the shocking events in “The Other” storyline, Peter recieves this new costume to help him adjust to his newest developments, as well as giving him some added muscle! Designed by Marvel Editor-In-Chief Joe Quesada, this new design has a few tricks up its sleeve. “The Iron Spider design- as I like to call it- came to me during a Spider-Man story meeting we were having, we were talking and I was involuntarily sketching on a pad. It’s inspired by a sketch that Chris Bachalo did that showed a new Spidey costume with . I thought that was brilliant, especially since it echoed one of Spidey’s greatest villains, and I took the idea and imagined it as though seeing it through the eyes of Tony Stark. The sky’s the limit with respect to gadgetry when it comes to Tony inspired costumes.”

Every couple of years, I poke my head back into comics to see if it’s safe to get back in the water.

See you in 2008, Marvel.

Who likes Kristanna Loken? Who wants to see her naked in Bloodrayne?

All right, that’s quite a show of hands. Now, how many of you actually want to see Bloodrayne?

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It’s lonely in here.

It’s official. Brad Pitt put his hoo-hoo in Angelina Jolie’s cha-cha. Now it seems that she’s pregnant, which will probably signal the end of her dynamite figure and her status as the #1 object of lust on the face of the planet.

No word yet on whether or not Jennifer Aniston has filled that cyanide prescription yet, but we’ll keep you posted.

People’s Choice Awards Results: Blarrrrgh

But it was “Star Wars: Episode III – Revenge of the Sith” that took home the night’s biggest awards on Tuesday. The final chapter in George Lucas’ series was named Favorite Movie and Favorite Movie Drama at the awards show.

His six-part space epic has rarely been on critic’s lists, despite raking in billions, so for Lucas the wins were sweet revenge. “I’m not a big favorite with the critics, but who listens to them?” Lucas said while accepting the award for Favorite Movie from Harrison Ford, according to Reuters. “The reason I make films is for you. The audience rules.”

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Dear people: Fuck you.

That is all.