BAMF

This one goes out to my cousin, who could probably use a pick-me-up.

And just to make it up to the rest of you, here’s some footage of Transformers. May God have mercy on us all.

Choke Gets A Writer.

This was a great Palahniuk book, possibly my favorite. If you haven’t had the pleasure, I highly reccommend picking it up. The guy picks up chicks at Sexaholics Anonymous for cryin’ out loud, the book is worth it for the dating advice alone.

Here’s the Team Fortress 2 Trailer, which looks fan-freaking-tastic.

As if I needed another reason to buy a 360.

Oooh, and shortly thereafter, the Half Life 2: Episode 2 trailer hits the net, with a couple minutes of high-def footage. Enjoy.

Oh sweet nectar, it looks like they’re going to bring SimCity to the Nintendo DS, and Famitsu magazine just published photos to whet your whistle. I don’t see why these kinds of titles weren’t in development right from the very start, the DS screams for mouse-driven titles. Blizzard had better be working on a port of Warcraft or Starcraft, or both. Better that they do both, as my anger is quite terrible.

Did anyone out there play Age of Empires for the DS? I heard it was meh, but I’m aching to get back into an RTS of some sort.

I started playing Starfox DS today, and thus far I’m underwhelmed. I can accept the wildly unnecessary stylus control system, but thus far every single level has been a tiny square map with an endless array of repetitive enemies. I thought that killing the “mothership” with the spin attack was cute the first time, but after the fifth, it was pretty old. Especially considering that they’ve changed the spin attack into some stylus controlled boost-like nonsense. I dunno, I really want to like it, but the controls and lackluster levels aren’t making me happy.

The shining light at the end of the DS tunnel are the amazing fall/winter titles on the horizon, including Final Fantasy III, which has sold out in Japan within it’s first week. Here’s hoping that there are a crapload of DS-happy Japs across the Pacific right now.

Your Tone… It’s All Wrong…

I can’t deprive you of Walkenclips.com, it’s too much bitchin’ wrapped up in a tight little package. You must be exposed to it. And exposed you shall be.

Armor Of God PJs. …. dot com.

My little sister sent this, after expressing her disdain in knowing that they did not have a set in my size, considering my impending birthday. God bless her.

I don’t know why this video of Tara Reid getting denied entry to some LA club (while fellow skank-of-the-moment Paris Hilton breezes on through) is so damned satisfying, but… it is.

What can I say? I enjoy imagining those frankennipples destiffening as her celebrity status wanes before her very eyes. I’m not a nice man baby, I’m exactly what your mother warned you about.

If I had any legitimate children, here is what their misappropriated child support would have been spent on this week:

• Young And Revolting and Revoltingly Young, the latest two C.D. Payne books in the Nick Twisp series, have now made it to Amazon. I’m finished with the book 5 and midway through book 6, and plan to review them sometime in the next week.
• Starfox DS – Here’s hoping that the controls don’t blow, because daddy really needs a bitchin’ Starfox title after the lameness on the Gamecube. Plus, I could really use a new DS game to wash the Tenchu DS out of my mouth.
• Arrested Development: Season 3 – 8 bazillion shitty reality TV shows endure on primetime, yet one of the best shows ever made somehow only makes it through three seasons. Fucking ridiculous. Still, this boxed set is only $20, which is a pretty sweet deal for the amount of comedy they pack into every episode.

Remember last week, when I said that the Transformers flick might be good? Yeah, let’s downgrade that to a very slight possibility.

Not Fooling Anybody seeks to out businesses in your area that look oddly familiar. Such as that chiropractic office with the bucket out front, or the deja-vu inducing Exaco gas station.

Those Jon’s Marketplaces have been popping up all around LA and Orange County, although I’ve yet to saunter into one. I can say that the one steakhouse that got converted into an OG Pancake House is far better off. I say let them convert old churches into the Pancake House, I’ll say hallelujah. And try to work in a few more Roscoe’s while youre at it.