BAMF

Inbetween working my ass off and lifting beer mugs this week, I’ve been terribly addicted to Tower Defence, which is sort of like keeping whordes of Orcs out of your camp in Warcraft II by only using towers. It’s like crack, and I’ve only made it to level 80 thus far.

If you like Risk, you might like DiceWars.

In honor of the free tickets to the Spike TV Video Game Awards, we’re putting up a new slice: the very hot and slightly forbidden Hayden Panettiere, who will be at the show.

First person to piss her off by asking when she’ll turn 18, or overusing the “save the cheerleader, save the world” tagline, gets a drink from me.

Alright kids, I know that it’s been a couple of days, so I’d better make up for it with something bitchin’. Work has made me neglect you, so let’s overcompensate, sort of like how my dad did after he’d go off on unannounced “business trips” and come back with BB Guns or half full bottles of Johnny Walker as a reward for being the man of the house. 8 was a great age, and now you’re going to relive my 8-year-old happiness.

PJ, longtime friend of the Mofo who has hooked me up with countless perks, is now hooking up all of you, in the form of two free tickets to the 2006 Spike TV Video Game Awards. PJ just joined the Spike TV crew, and has assured me that they learned their lesson from last time, and won’t be giving Game of the Year to Halo 3. Plus, they’ve got Samuel L. Jackson hosting, Tenacious D playing, and various hot celebrity chicks attending that you’d probably never be able to meet without warranting an immediate restraining order. And last but not least… I’ll be there. Probably lit up like Christmas and throwing snakes onstage, but I will indeed attend the show.

Details: It’s next Friday at the USC Galen Center. Print out the PDF, take it to the Galen Center box office either the day of or day before the event, and then get all dolled up for adventure. And nerds. But definitely adventure.

Be sure to check out the ads from Mega64 here and here. You can also do your part by voting for the awards, and checking out all of the videos and guests and other goodness surrounding the event. And then be prepared to have your ass blown out by awesomeness, and probably a few misappropriated awards.

Be sure to let me know if you’re going, we’ll arrange a MoFo meet-n-greet, and you can tell Bolt how much you hated him in The Trial of Raygun.

Britney Spears showed off quite a bit over the last week, probably on the reccommendation of her new BFF, Paris Hilton. She took another cue the other day, when she… well, see for yourself.

Wow. C-section scar and everything. Lovely. You can’t see them all over at SOTD, so they’ll be over here as well.

Here’s the first still from the upcoming Transformers flick to feature an actual Transformer in it. Or so the folks over at Fatty’s website (AICN) claim.

Looks more like a Zerg rush to me.

Dude… You have to love it when people act they way that we assume that they will. Here’s Courtney Love posing stark fucking naked.

She may be old and haggard Courtney… but still… she’s naked.

Wow, there’s already a teaser trailer up for Harry Potter & The Order of the Phoenix. Just goes to show you how much I didn’t appreciate that last flick. Here’s the full teaser trailer.

I’m the only person amongst my group of friends to truly dislike the rushed pace and questionable plotline of Harry Potter & The Goblet of Fire, mainly because I’m the only person in my group of friends (Bolt included) who neglected to actually read the Goddamned book. However, I did attempt to read “Order of the Phoenix” and I hope that they can do the book justice. Sadly, I doubt this as my friends were delusional about the validity of the last film because they could fill in the mental blanks with information that they had read four years previous.

It’s like a pre-prequels Star Wars fan, except with less explanations or sanity.

Michael “Kramer” Richards goes off.

Eh. If you’ve ever been to a live comedy show, sometimes the comedians pick on the ethnicity of hecklers or talkers to shame them into shutting the fuck up. It’s just that Michael Richard’s way of picking on them wasn’t funny.

OK… it was kind of funny.

Another day, another Lindsay Lohan crotch shot.

I appreciate the fact that she completely despises underpants, but could she at least give us one appealing shot so my cock doesnt curl up like the Wicked Witch of the East’s feet after they dropped the fucking house on her.