Author: Sharkey

MIT Mario Bros. “Hack”

Some adventurous (and nerdy) MIT students pranked one of the halls by turning it into a giant Mario Bros. level. I particularly appreciated the flag on top, can’t finish the level without it.

Ooooh sweeeeet nectar. I’ve always loved Eliza Dushku, and now I get to know a bit more about her grooming habits. What an excellent day.

I always imagined her as a landing strip kinda gal, myself.

More pics from the “slip” incident. Might help to assuage your fears that it’s a fake.

Got emailed this about 80 times today, but it never hurts to share the wealth:

Chappelle Theory

Read a very long winded (and probably 100% ficticious) account of the plot to keep Chappelle’s Show from returning. Featuring evil, oppressing Oprah Winfrey!

New V For Vendetta Trailer

Yeah… something that I’m actually looking forward to. Imagine that.

I’m pleased by today’s SOTD. I had a big crush on Tea Leoni when I was younger (so did pieguy of SOTD, it seems) and now she’s going to be in Fun w/Dick & Jane with Jim Carrey on Friday. I won’t see it… but I support her ability to continue acting. Mainly because it makes me feel not quite so fucking old to see her onscreen, still looking somewhat attractive.

She kinda showed a little boob in Spanglish. That made me happy.

Nick Lachey is going to be one smiling motherfucker, after he receives his first alimony check from Jessica Simpson. She just rallied up the gumption to file for divorce from the former… what the fuck band was he in?

…meh, like it matters. The guy is taking one back for us all, and for that we should applaud him. He got to tag one of the most desirable women on the planet, live in a house that her talent (*ahemtits*) built, and now he gets a slice of her massive bank account. God almighty… there is… a God almighty.

The guy has some enviable luck. Tip your hat to this motherfucker tonight lads… he’s set the bar for us all.

And on a calm Thursday afternoon, I am bestowed with newfound respect for Steve Guttenberg.

You had a string of hits in the 1980s. What have you been up to lately?

There are 100,000 actors in the Screen Actors Guild. Only 2,000 of them make more than $75,000 (£42,000) a year. That means 98,000 actors make less than $75,000 a year. From 1980 to 1990, I shot more films than any other actor in the Screen Actors Guild apart from Gene Hackman. Everyone keeps asking me that stupid question: “What are you doing?” I say: “Why do I need to do anything? I’m rich.” Do you want me to be poor again? Do you want me to go back to making tomato soup out of ketchup and water? Or would you like me to be a multimillionaire and be rewarded for all the entertainment I gave you for all those years? I’m enjoying life now. If I was a plumber and I’d done the most plumbing jobs between 1980 and 1990, everyone would be saying: “What a great plumber” – he says “f**k you to the world and he’s enjoying himself.” But for some reason, as an actor, you’re not allowed to say: “I’m f**king rich, bro.”

There’s nothing I can add to this. It’s just fucking awesome. Winners. We’re all winners today, thanks to this article.

Man oh man, do I like that Morgan Webb. The sexy host of whatever shitty G4/TechTV show that needs boob-induced ratings this week has just been featured in FHM, and the pics are pretty excellent. Enjoy.

That girl needs to pull a Cat Schwartz and inadvertantly (or intentionally) put up some boobie pics. Now.

I was walking past the candy aisle this morning and something caught my eye. On one of the packages I was sure I saw “Not to be used for weight control.” So I backed up a step, and sure enough, right on a package of sweet delicious empty calories was the aforementioned phrase. I’d like to meet the asshole who sued because he tried to use Skittles as a fat burner, which resulted in this.

By the way: I’d like to thank Google for clueing me in to “International Women’s Day.” Somewhere out there, a woman seriously wants you to spend money on her for this momentous holiday. Buy her some Skittles.

Thanks to the five million of you who sent me emails entitled “Unidor Strikes Again” and “Your Wife Is Free!”, because it makes my soul happy. And no, that’s not sarcasm. Go Unidor.

“Unidorrr, flying high in the sky,
Unidorrr, freeing your favorite pie.
Unidorrr, soaring free as a bird,
Unidorrr, made Katie Holmes drop that turd.
Unidor… UNIDOORRRRRRRRRRRR!

Unidor© copyright 2005 BAMF Productions. All rights reserved. Please use Unidor responsibly.