Another Double Team

Once again, two links, same theme. What the fuck is going on, did I fall asleep while God let another few million assholes onto the planet? Actually, I guess that happens all the time. That’s what the Malthion X is for. Anyway, links and such:

[ Couple Sells Baby Outside Of Wal-Mart ]

The Harts were arrested Saturday in front of the Danville Wal-Mart Supercenter. Police said they had tried to sell their baby to a prospective adoptive couple for $3,000.

All Hart asked for — and all the Cromers gave her — was “a housecoat to wear at the hospital and a barbecue chicken dinner,” Cromer said.

Did that chicken dinner come with mashed ‘taters and some bisquits? Because if not, those folks got screwed. Always try to haggle. And by the way, this is one more reason that we should demolish every fucking Wal-Mart Supercenter on the face of the Earth. I’ve been to one, and I can tell you that it’s nothing but a breeding ground for trash of all colors, and enough mullets to overwhelm a fleet of barbers.

[ Woman accused of trying to sell her child for bail ]

A 19-year-old woman being held at the Carroll County Detention Center was charged yesterday with trying to sell her 2-year-old son for $250 so she could get out of jail to await trial on a drug charge, police said.

Judith Ann Garland of Baltimore was charged after a two-month investigation that began when the Harford County woman to whom the child was offered for sale called authorities, said Maryland State Police Sgt. James DeWees.

At least she didn’t get talked down to a hundred bucks and a plate of barbecued chicken. Although if she’d been successful, she might have had time to birth herself a few more youngin’s in time to have a mighty fine Thanksgiving dinner next year at Applebees.

Meh, I figure these twisted fucks are too stupid to live, let alone be responsible for the lives of children. So I say let them sell, in fact, we should legalize the shit and set up an eBay for the sole purpose of selling your useless crack babies. We could call it bayBay. Think about it, you can use your handy Paypal debit card to purchase yourself a slightly retarded five year old with a knack for scoring blow at a fair price. That, or you can have yourself a fine Thanksgiving dinner with all the trimmings. In fact, that should be bayBay’s slogan: Kids Or Meat. World hunger problem solved, overpopulation problem solved. Next crisis please.

See, this is why you need me kids. Results.