I just wanted to give you guys a heads-up on some grandiose films that just made their way from archaic VHS to the delicious DVD format this week. Save your pennies!
- Captain Ron — (There’s guerillas in them forests, chief)
- Little Big League — (Starring the kid from The Wizard! How can you go wrong?!?)
- Mr. Nanny — (Hulkamania becomes completely faggotted up)
- Monkey Trouble — (with Thora Birch, who’s boobies were seen in American Beauty)
- Suburban Commando — (that’s two Hulk Hogan flicks in one day! Sweet Jesus!)
- Surf Ninjas — (Ernie Reyes Jr. & Sr.?!? I can hardly contain my pee!)
- Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2: Secret of the Ooze — (Ice, Ice, Baby!)
- Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 3 — (Casy Jones, where were you in part II?!?)
I poke fun, but you know what the sad truth of the matter is? I’ve seen about 90% of the movies on that list.
So have you, dickhead. Don’t judge me.