Movie Junk

Freddy Vs. Jason Trailer – you know what’s funny, I actually saw Jason X a couple of weeks ago on cable. I don’t think it’s going to be easy to put aside the complete comedic value of that flick when it comes to this. Especially after that bit where they showed Jason a vision of Camp Crystal Lake circa 1980 and completely parodied itself. “Hi, would you like to enjoy some beer and marijuana with us? Or how about premarital sex? We LOOOVE premarital sex!” *boobies* I don’t think I’ve laughed that hard since… well, I guess since I saw the trailer for Jason X in the theaters.

Everyone got tickets for Matrix Reloaded tomorrow night at around 10:30. If you’re interested, a lot of people have been commenting about it, and some of the reviews aren’t so good. That’s what I expected really, because a lot of people can’t distinguish between the opening story, where it slaps you in the genital region with a mind blowing concept, and then the sequel just sort of draws that concept out. Without the excessive cock-slap, they’re not aware of the movie’s actual quality. What is sad, however, is that my non-geek of a girlfriend has been bugging me as to why Neo didn’t just tear the Matrix apart with his mind like he did to Agent Smith in the first flick. I’ve been telling her for weeks that Reloaded will no doubt answer those questions for us all, but from what I understand now, the movie completely avoids the subject. I know WB is closely tied with DC Comics, did they have a Crisis on Infinite Earths kind of thing while we weren’t looking, sort of stripping away Superman’s ability to move the Sun and do the mind-wipe kiss? I’m not a big fan of when they change a character’s abilities to conveniently move along a story idea, a la Anakin, the all-powerful vergence of the force who can’t go ten fucking seconds without getting his arm lopped off. *thumbs up*

Oh well, I don’t really give a shit. The movie will probably be pretty damn good, and I’m going to E3 the next morning so I’ll have even more reason to wet myself in public. Besides, I can always see X-Men 2 again.

BTW, go ahead and see A Mighty Wind, if for no other reason than to support the troupe that makes these flicks. Oh, and because Eugene Fucking Levy is in it. If Godzilla, Galactus, or Mike Ditka ever start trashing the planet, Eugene is the one person who may be able to save us all. I’d say let Michael Mckean do it, but Ditka might have seen him in Short Circuit 2, and then we’d all be fucked.

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Categorized as News

By Sharkey

I run bamf.

7 comments

  1. sweet jesus yes!Finally! It only took them an eternity, but finally they’re making the movie. It’ll no doubt suck, but my fanboi geektitude requires I see it.

  2. That’s the last strawYou’re resorting to making fun of Jason movies now?Put Amy the monkey back on. She’s more entertaining that you.

  3. *cries*IM SORRY! IM SORRY IM SO UNENTERTAINING BABY! PLEASE GIVE ME ANOTHER CHANCE, I PROMISE ILL DO BETTER! DONT STOP READING MY SITE, YOURE ALL IVE GOT!Or, you know, you could fuck off I guess.

  4. Saw matrix last night early screeningIt rocked a$$ is all I can say. Anyone who says different doesn’t appreciate Reloaded for it’s true value, a REAL sequel which actually pays homage to it’s original story. The shit-fucks that say otherwise are more than likely a bunch of old fat and wrinkly critics that only expected another -blah- action movie with cool effects. AICN fatass is a prime example.

  5. sweet shiti havnt seen matrix reloaded yet but i know im gunna like it and thanks for the freddy vs jason link i cant fucking wait for that even thought most ppl are gunna say it sucks i know its gunna be good for me… hmmm seems like im talking about sex… anyways thanxs for the link and props to the site

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